Northstar Counseling Center

502-414-1301
  • Home
  • Our Blog
  • Contact
  • Our Staff
    • Carol Ann Hamilton Isbell
    • Amanda Driggs
    • Nikki Heekin
    • Megan Henderson
    • Frances Mican
    • Andrew Swan
    • Sara Hagan
    • Danielle Ludlum
    • April Smith English
    • Meredith Edelen
      • Milo
    • Ashley Dountz
    • Sara Schuhmann
    • Carsyn Mattingly
    • Bailey Mortis
    • Beth Truman
  • Services
    • Individual Therapy
    • Couples Therapy
      • ​Couples Workshops
        • Hold Me Tight®
        • Bringing Baby Home
    • Family Therapy
    • Psychiatric Services & Medication Management
    • Children & Teens Counseling
    • ​Premarital Counseling
  • Supervision & Training
    • Online Continuing Education for Therapists in Kentucky
    • Clinical Licensure Supervision
    • Community Trainings
  • Resources
  • FAQ
  • Continuing Education
  • Join Our Team!
You are here: Home / Anxiety / Riding the Wave: The Art of Surrender

Riding the Wave: The Art of Surrender

February 19, 2024 by Sara Hagan

“Ride the wave” is a surfing phrase we’ve all heard. People say this when they’re encouraging someone to lean into whatever is happening, especially when it’s difficult. In life, we have plenty of waves that come our way, and there is an art to learning when and how to ride those waves. 

The art of “riding the wave” involves controlling what you can within a situation, and leaning into what you cannot control. Learning the difference can take a lot of practice but is a very important part of the process. All human beings want to feel like they have some control and influence over situations in their lives. And, fortunately, we do have control over so many things! We can often control certain factors that contribute to situations happening (or not), as well as how and when those situations happen. We can and should do things with intention to steer our lives in certain directions. Yet, there are many things that we cannot control, and we can make peace with this idea even if we really don’t like it! 

If ‘controlling whatever factors you can’ is one side of the coin in “riding the wave,” the other side of the coin is the ‘surrender’ part. When I say ‘surrender,’ some people may think of defeat. However, surrendering can be an active choice to make peace with what is happening, rather than feeling like you’re giving up because you’re forced to. Surrender often involves the acceptance of the uncomfortable feelings that come with some situations instead of trying to avoid or eliminate them. Riding the wave doesn’t mean that you learn to like every situation, which would be wildly unrealistic. Rather, it means that you accept that there are hard and undesirable factors at play that you consciously choose to surrender to, knowing that how one handles these factors determines so much of an outcome. Intentional surrender is an act of control in-and-of-itself!

What if, instead of using our precious energy to try to change things that cannot be changed, we shifted our energy to riding the wave and having confidence that we can and will handle whatever outcomes life hands us? This can prevent unproductive exhaustion and saves us some energy to put towards things that we can change. The story we tell ourselves (ie our perspective), the healing we do, the skills we learn, and how we decide to proceed are all important uses of our energy that are within our control. These things very much affect outcomes when those waves come up in our lives, and those are where we can find our sense of intention and power. Focusing on these things is the productive and empowering work that is within our control. Our power does not lie in trying to stop or fight the waves; our power comes from how we navigate situations and make sense of those outcomes. Where and to what we decide to surrender to are within our control and make ALL of the difference! So, next time you feel like you are treading water or being caught up in one of life’s riptides, I invite you to slow down and consider what is and what is not within your control, then decide to ride the wave on the things that are not.

Share this:

  • Tweet
  • Email

Related

Filed Under: Anxiety, counseling, grief and loss, mental health, Stress Management Tagged With: Anixety, counseling, emotions, grief, mental health, stress management

Author Profile


Sara Hagan
MFT Associate* [she/her]

Read Profile

Blog Categories

  • adolescents
  • Anxiety
  • Children
  • communication
  • Communication
  • counseling
  • Couples
  • couples workshop
  • Depression
  • education
  • Family
  • grief and loss
  • Happiness
  • Health & Wellness
  • language
  • mental health
  • mindfulness
  • Nutrition
  • Online Dating
  • Parenting
  • Perfectionism
  • Postpartum
  • Pregnancy
  • Relationships
  • seasonal affective disorder
  • Self Improvement
  • Self-Care
  • sex education
  • Stress Management
  • teens
  • therapy
  • Toddlers
  • trauma
  • tweens
  • Uncategorized

Blog Posts by Staff

  • Allison Hock Howell
  • Amanda Driggs
  • Amanda Villaveces
  • Andrew Swan
  • April Smith English
  • Ashley Dountz
  • Bailey Mortis
  • Beth Truman
  • Carol Ann Isbell
  • Carsyn Kidwell
  • Coralie McEachron
  • Cynthia Rigdon
  • Danielle Ludlum
  • Frances Mican
  • Haley Klein
  • Jennifer Coulter
  • Kary Stivers
  • Kristin Tribbett
  • Lauren McGrath
  • Megan Henderson
  • Meredith Edelen
  • Nikki Heekin
  • Northstar Guest Author
  • Rachel Heyne
  • Sara Hagan
  • Sara Schuhmann

Subscribe to Blog via Email

Enter your email address to subscribe to this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Recent Posts

  • The Power of Spring Cleaning April 28, 2025
  • Why You Should Practice Hard Conversations Ahead of Time  April 14, 2025
  • Finishing the School Year Strong: A practical guide to stress & anxiety management March 31, 2025

120 Sears Ave
Suite 205
Louisville, KY 40207
(502) 414-1301

Sitemap

  • Home
  • Our Blog
  • Our Staff
  • Supervision & Training
  • Resources
  • FAQ
  • Contact
  • Privacy Policy

Copyright © 2025 · Beautiful Pro Theme on Genesis Framework · WordPress · Log in